Toyota GR Yaris

‘Avoid Excessive Acceleration Due to Temperature’ flashes a message from the instrument binnacle of the GR Yaris when you grumble its decidedly spunky little 1.6 litre turbo into life. Hardly surprising, a first reaction, to receive a warning from the average Toyota not to drive fast if you’re feeling poorly…

However, this is anything but the average Toyota, and that all too genuine reminder of the three-pot potency burbling under the bonnet highlights just one of the hatful of differences between a standard Yaris and this outrageous little homologation monsterpiece.

Now, the homologation regulations dictating that WRC rally cars must be based on an existing showroom model have been in place for years. But only recently have they stipulated that, rather than crafting as few road-going versions as you can get away with -traditionally a couple of hundred or so, nothing less than 25,000 will now suffice.

And in response, rather than merely applying rally-flavoured go faster tape to a forecourt favourite -the staple homologation measure, Toyota has actually designed a rally car for the road, and then taken it rallying.

So the wheelbase, light clusters, door mirrors and roof fin are stock Yaris, and pretty much everything else isn’t. The front half of the chassis may be Yaris, but the rear is a Corolla and CH-R hybrid. The resultant structure, calling to mind the heat-struck Coldstream Guard planting his face in the parade ground at the Trooping of the Colour, is the last word in rigidity.

The bodywork is 55 mm longer, 60 mm wider and 45 mm lower than that of the standard car. Indeed, the roofline is nearer 100 mm lower at the rear to improve the efficiency of the rear wing; Toyota’s WRC boss, Tommi Makinen, wanted it even lower, but Toyota insisted on keeping the rear seats. The rear doors have vanished, though, the roof is carbon fibre and the door skins, bonnet and tailgate are aluminium.

Oh, and, the front grille is all grille; no blanking plates here to stifle the inhalation requirements of the world’s most powerful production three-cylinder engine. It’s single turbo spinning on ball bearings, the 1.6 litre unit gruffs out 257 bhp and 266 lb ft of torque. This may sound somewhat average for a hot hatch these days, but the GR weighs only 1280 kg. And besides, 0-62 mph in 5.5 seconds and a full George of 143 mph is only half the story, and but a fraction of the fun…

Power is delivered to the road surface via a six-speed manual transmission -no paddles here- and what is claimed to be the lightest 4WD system on the market. An aluminium central transfer case offers three diving modes: Normal, Sport and Track, with front to rear torque split 60:40, 30:70 and 50:50 respectively. At the rear, an electrically controlled clutch divides torque between the wheels. The specimen I drove was also equipped with the £3500 Circuit Pack, which lobs in a tyre and alloy wheel upgrade, retuned suspension and mechanical front and rear Torsen differentials, adding even more bravado to the system.

You may, instead, opt for the £1500 Convenience Pack, which adds a JBL stereo, ambient lighting, a head up display and other such goodies. But you can’t have both. And on the basis that you really, really won’t want to listen to the stereo, you won’t want both either.

On board, there’s a deal less to explain why it takes Toyota ten times longer to build the GR than a standard Yaris. Door panels and heater controls are exactly the same, whilst the dashboard is, if anything even simpler -clear, unfussy analogue dials imprisoning the small LCD screen which tells you to drive slowly with flu.

The driving position’s high by hot hatch standards, but, abetted by nicely bolstered seats, extremely comfortable. And that bolstering, metal pedals, a gear lever raised by 50 mm to bring it even closer to the part-alcantara helm, a rotary controller for driving modes, a proper handbrake (which disconnects drive to the rear wheels if you yank it on the go) and a plaque letting you know the car has been ‘developed for the FIA World rally Championship’ is -as far as on-board signalling of intent goes- the lot.

On the move, it takes but 100 yards to realise that this car is a seriously taut and purposeful proposition. And the engine’s a riot… Below about 3000 rpm it displays the typically off-beat characteristics of a three-pot. Thereafter, it revels in being pushed; said revelry reinforced by the artificial augmentation of the noises under the bonnet to the extent that, by the time the needle is closing on 6000 rpm, the cockpit is awash with the sound of the unit inhaling like an asthmatic dragon about to blow out the candles on his birthday cake.

Universal downsizing of cubic capacity has made such augmentation something of a current rage. But at least the GR still sounds like a triple, unlike Cupra’s Formentor which, somewhat depressingly, uses artificial noises off to make a four-cylinder engine sing like it has the five with which the hot SUV has yet to be equipped.

The ride sheds most of its pottering speed grump with the application of throttle, both steering and brakes have a wonderfully brusque just-shut-up-and-get-on-with-it attitude to proceedings, and the gear change serves as a constant reminder of what it’s like to be properly mechanically connected to the thing you’re driving.

So, select the Track setting to give you 50:50 front to rear torque distribution (a tad less squirrely that the rear-biased Sport on B roads) and you’ll quickly forget about the analysis of minutiae in favour of the sheer unadulterated pleasure of chucking something around that really is more fun than a room full of nuns with Tourette’s syndrome.

The GR Yaris goes, sticks and turns with such hilarious abandon that’s quite unlike anything else I can remember enjoying as much in an age. 33 grand may seem somewhat pricey for a Yaris, but if you even suspect that smashing every piggy bank in the house might get you close, I strongly urge you to fetch a hammer immediately. Alas, I doubt we may ever see its like again.